

Redwood Times


Top Stories of the Day
The Horde's Newest Bar:
The Filthy Animal
and if you haven't seen the Times in a week see the new vistas, rumors, calendar and home front news by clicking the links above!

picture submission from
Raush Cloudsong
It started off with a rush to Northrend, but as things settle down, bases established, locals commandeered into the ranks, and enemies identified, Roadhouse checks out Dalaran's Filthy Animal.
While not as 'posh' as The Legerdemain Lounge, the Filthy Animal has mammoth sized tankards, plenty of room, and doesn't spare on the dragon wings.
And the Horde certainly knows how to relax after a week in the field...
picture submission from
Longwalker Kaylan Ragehorn

picture submission from
Maragwyn

picture submission from
Pogo'Pogo... you can kind of just see him there ... sneaky troll!
The only complaints so far, are a direct contrast to previous Horde complaints. Some of the patrons can not be seen over the extremely large counters, they do not host a band like the World's End Tavern, and for some, there is a general lack of chairs around the tables; the Shu'halo seem to prefer their knees not bumping into tables.
All in all, the Filthy Animal seems an ideal spot to relax high above our new home in chilly Northrend.

Yestermoon's News
Flùffÿ Flies Over Additional Obstacles at Brewfest
story by Father Foribaek "Flùffÿ" Flintfury
Sept 27 2022

Ye ever just want yer mornin' ale, and the Ram Racers tell ye need to work a bit to get a few pint?
Well that is just what happened to ol' Flùffÿ this very mornin'... I left me apartment in the Forlorn Caverns and travelled down to Brewfest, sliding down the icy embankment o' course, cause it's faster than takin' the road and it's fun to slide in the snow!
But once I got to Brewfest, it was eerily quiet, but stiil they wanted more kegs delivere'. "I said where's everybody at?" An' ye know what they replied?
Northrend... What in the world would anyone go to Northrend during Brewfest?
Well, I says, "Sure, I'll pick up a few barrels or a dozen, but I'm gonna want some ham an' eggs with me pint!"
and we struck a deal, but what happene' while I was makin' me deliveries has me pretty heated this mornin'!
Ye see, there's enough obstacles like trees and fences when yer runnin' ale, but look at these two knucklehead mountaineers, right in the way. Well, ol' Flùffÿ showed them.. showed 'em the bottomside o' a ram. HAHAHA!
Visiting Stormwind and Ironforge at Rush Hour... special thanks to Kush Lords
story by Okwaho Redwood
Sept 24 2022
picture submission from
Owly
Picture this: You are in the Horde and hungry. You think you can take the airship to Grom'gol, hang out at the beach, and share some BBQ with your friends around a bonfire.
Only to find, the food has already been eaten, as Grom'gol Beach is one of the hottest resorts in Azeroth.
Journey with the Horde as they search for some food, perhaps Stormwind Brie or Dwarven Mild will do...

picture submission from
Okwaho
There was certainly a rush out of the gates of Grom'gol. I felt lucky that I was not at the back of the pack. It stretches a good distance behind me.
And while I am enjoying time with our Tribesmembers, there are also some good laughs early on and a good opportunity to meet new recruits to the Horde. Well met! and may the Earth Mother bless us with some food and ale!

picture submission from
Okwaho
Wait, I think I have fallen behind some. But, at least I am with my Longwalker. If anyone can get me to the store counter at the cheese shop, it will be Kaylan Ragehorn!
I may also need a few minutes to try some samples, so Longwalker, I expect to not be interrupted!

picture submission from
Gerohar
From the urgency that we enter Stormwind, it should be clear how hungry many of us were now.... and thirsty of course. Maybe some baked bread and ale to go with the cheese is in order.
We tried to reason with the guards, especially since we have been having peace talks about working together against the Lich King, but perhaps the Stormwind Guards have not received the news about a possible alliance.

picture submission from
Okwaho
I thought the cheese shop was here at the gates. Perhaps I was mistaken.
Regardless, once inside the gates, naturally we wanted to pay our respects to the Alliance leaders.
We asked for directions, but there were quite a few questions being asked of us, as well. So, we just kept moving. I, mean, many of have visited in the past, swam in their canals... have you smelled those canals, what is in there?
Anyway...

picture submission from
Okwaho
We found the Castle entrance and ... well, I guess some might say we stormed the castle. But it was a long walk up this marble hallway and for Shu'halo and Trolls and Orcs that do not wear feet coverings that often, it was very cold and uncomfortable.
Some were complaining so loudly that the Stormwind guards began to take offense and a fight broke out in the Throne Room of their King.
And this caused even further problems when angry citizens of the Alliance came up behind us... I was surprised when I did not see pitchforks and torches amongst the screaming townsfolk!
both picture submissions from
Okwaho


picture submission from
Okwaho
Quickly we decided that there were just too many customers at Stormwind's cheese shop and probably all the taverns, too. What can you expect on a Saturday night, except for Alliance meet ups over in The Park and the Mage Quarters! But we were closer to Old Town and maybe just should have stopped there.
But, we decided to hop on the tram and see if we could find an opening at one of the taverns in Ironforge. We had hosted a Roadhouse there in the past, so it was expected we would receive a warm welcome!

We did have to wait a bit for a tram. I was just happy that my knees were not scrunched up under a table and there was room to stretch out. Of course, with Shu'halo, we could use a slightly larger seat with room between so we can sit next to one another.
picture submission from
Okwaho

picture submission from
Branharak Skybreaker

picture submission from
Okwaho
When the tram came, I may have made a mistake on choosing which car to get on. Normal Shu'halo weigh a good bit and these tram cars are not very large.
But I had chosen a crowded car and then friend Gorge of Thunderhoof Tribe stepped on... Gorge is gorgeous, as we all know, but he is also much larger than a normal Shu'halo. The car leaned precariously and I had to shift to the other side dragging a few more with me to even it out.
No one can question their sturdiness after last night!

There seemed to be some confusion as we entered Ironforge.
We all know that the tram is built by the gnomes... the very small Alliance, smaller than the Longbeards. And we were going to explain about the lack of signs suggesting a weight limit on the trams as a safety measure. Safety Inspector Nby would expect nothing less of Bran and myself!. We attempted to find a gnome to report this safety issues immediately upon entering and we could not find one as everyone exited the tram tunnel at the same time.
Perhaps a turnstile system for more orderly entrance and departures could also be useful here. If there was not such a logjam of bodies we ... possibly... could have found a gnome and avoided a lot of conflict here.
picture submission from
Okwaho

picture submission from
Branharak Skybreaker

picture submission from
Sauromoon
We are certain that disaster was about to strike in that little area the Longbeards allow the gnomes to exist in!
For instance, just look at the thunderstorms hovering over an area filled with the clacking of moving gears. Do you know what can happen when gears are grinding? Sparks!!! In fact, there is proof of a spark right there. Thank goodness someone put up a shield or that might have hurt!
Where are the safety signs about operating heavy machinery with threat of thunderstorms... indoors?

And we have further evidence that lightning in these conditions can wrought very strange effects. I am used to seeing skeletons in Lordaeron, in fact we have welcomed a skeleton to the Bluffs several times... a nice bone man by the name of Anedrion. But I do not think the Alliance are known to consort with skeletons very much, so this must be a result of the dangerous conditions we have identified.... oh, and we found a gnome finally!
picture submission from
Branharak Skybreaker

picture submission from
Branharak Skybreaker

picture submission from
Okwaho
We attempted to depart with all due haste and...
This must be what is meant by rush hour traffic. How are we going to ever find a seat on the tram now?
Well, it was fun to enjoy the company of so many fine members of the Horde, but perhaps we can plan a breakfast together... when the Alliance are at work!
Oh, and I am still hungry. Hopefully the mulgore spice bread is hot with a bit of fresh butter and honey!

Marching to the Tunes
A comparison of the Grin, the Dark Iron Dwarves, and the Shu'halo
story by Okwaho Redwood
Grin marching toon submitted by Pogo'pogo, pictures by Okwaho Redwood
Dark Iron Dwarves pictures by Leidolfr Redwood
Nancy "SingingHooves" Sinatra, Leidolfr Redwood Stomp and mash of previously submitted photos
Sept 24, 2022
Sometimes you need a little beat to keep you focused on the important things... like a fight for your life, or a raid to get more brew, or to defend yourself from unwanted offenses.
We hope you enjoy this little look into the Grin, the Dark Iron Dwarves, who are currently stealing our ale!, and what happens to those that come to the Bluffs with bad intentions!

Dark Iron Song
Dark Iron Herald says: Oh, we're from Blackrock Mountain,
We've come ta drink yer brew!
Dark Iron dwarves, they do not lie,
And so yeh know it's true!
Dark Iron Herald says: Yeh will not try our bitter,
Yeh will not serve our ale!
But have Brewfest without our lot?
Just try it, and ye'll fail!
Dark Iron Herald says: So lift a mug to Coren,
And Hurley Blackbreath too!
This drink is weak, without much kick,
But oi! At least it's brew!
Dark Iron Herald says: We'll drink yer stout and lager,
Drain all the pints and kegs!
We'll drink and brawl and brawl and drink,
'til we can't feel our legs!
Dark Iron Herald says: And when the brew's all missin'
Ta Shadowforge we'll hop,
A bitter toast ta Ragnaros...
... but bring him not a drop!

Blacktooth Grin Marching Song courtesy of Pogo’pogo
(Set to the tune of “When Johnny Comes Marching Home”)
When Blackhand comes riding in to mul,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
The peacechief’s dogs will all feel like fools
(Lol’tar! Ogar!)
All the grots will jump to their feet,
And serve a feast of dragon meat,
And we’ll all be grinning,
When Blackhand comes riding home.
Grunts and raiders will beat their shields,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
Shouting Lok’vadnod to Maim with zeal,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
With bloodthirst and song in their hearts,
They’ll war upon worlds both near and far,
And we’ll all be grinning,
When Blackhand comes riding home.
The shiny hat kings will cry with fear,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
When Blackhand’s band comes riding near,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
With hammer and axe, lash and blade,
the masters will do as they’re bade,
And we’ll all be grinning
When Blackhand comes riding home.
The regag will finally be weaned of drink,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
Yes the regag will finally be weaned of drink,
(Lok’tar! Ogar!)
The sythegore arm will raise a toast
To best laid plans they’ll start to boast
And we’ll all be grinning
When Blackhand comes riding home.




These Hooves are Made for Walkin’ by Nancy “SingingHooves” Sinatra
You keep sayin' you've got somethin' for me
Somethin' you call love but confess
You've been a'messin' where you shouldn't 've been a'messin'
And now someone else is getting all your best
These hooves are made for walkin'
And that's just what they'll do
One of these days these hooves are gonna walk all over you
Ya
You keep lyin' when you oughta be truthin'
And you keep losing when you oughta not bet
You keep samin' when you oughta be a'changin'
Now what's right is right but you ain't been right yet
These hooves are made for walkin'
And that's just what they'll do
One of these days these hooves are gonna walk all over you
You keep playin' where you shouldn't be playin'
And you keep thinkin' that you'll never get burnt (ha)
I just found me a brand new box of matches, yeah
And what he knows you ain't had time to learn
These hooves are made for walkin'
And that's just what they'll do
One of these days these hooves are gonna walk all over you
Are you ready, hooves? Start walkin'



Weekly Highlights
Tribes & Family & Friends Finish Strong
picture by Gin' jojo

The Redwoods defeat Kil'Jaeden as the Tribes depart the Outlands and turn their eyes to the North. Arthas awaits in the Frozen citadel along with many more adventures.
Of course, Arthas is not the only item of interest... for more info, join Bran and Leidolfr in two moons to find out more. (see ad of the day for details)
Redwoods Stand Tall!
Speaking of finishing strong. Cin'dol, General of the Horde, and Elder of the Tribes, now has a super cool new look. Now the Bone Bard can really play the bones!!! And talking about sitting TALL... look at those new Shu'halo Bulls overlooking the Bluffs. Of course, if you come to the Bluffs, you might find them a bit familiar, and who knows where this alternate reality will end up. And if that isn't a sight for sore eyes... what is Jay'zakk cooking up at his next hunting and BBQ get together? Hopefully we will find out soon!
Cin'dol be the one takin' this picture, mons!

White fur, shaman... hmm, I've a suspicion I know who this is.

Branharak snagged this close-up, but where is the photographer?

Jay'zakk returns to Mulgore and makes Raush Cloudsong a happy Shu'halo. Besties forever! (wait, white fur, shaman...)

The Two Sides of Brewfest
When Worlds Collide - Or at least Leidolfr of the Horde and Flùffÿ of the Alliance
story by: Leidolfr Redwood and Father Foribaek "Flùffÿ" Flintfury
9/21/2022
Leidolfr see strangest sights at the Bluffs when he goes to visit and ale taste test. As the brewmaster of Redwood, Leidolfr must sample and make sure our brews are meeting the tough standards of our regular customers. Leidolfr is used to seeing foul spewing scourge base in sky... but look there... Ha... a pink pachyderm... and that is not the only one... a whole herd has arrived!
Then Leidolfr must visit friends in Undercity and Silvermoon City... and look what Leidolfr sees... more of them. They are very friendly and just look how large they are! Leidolfr will try to convince Chief we should keep some after Brew Festival is completed.



But Leidolfr is most busy Shu'halo, even if from High Mountain and he
must return to Bluffs... Leidolfr see
strange sight to end all strange sights; it is Sage-Chief Okwaho flying through the air, arms spread like wings of bird.
Leidolfr report that you must be careful when flying off Bluffs. This is most common issue when Goblins are involved. Someday you will understand more of what Leidolfr is saying to you. Until then, be careful and enjoy the Brewfest!
Your turn little Dwarf friend...



First, Flùffÿ must say for a big guy with antlers, ye makin' the right choice to ignore that citadel thing. Me, I said look who's recrutin'... Argent dawn or Thunderbrew. Let's see here, which should I choose? I'll take racin' rams and drinkin' brews!
Hey! Magni... come down an' join me or ye gonna send that rascally High Tinker Mekkatorque to have all the fun? Ye got to leave the throne room once in a while, lad!
Maybe I can beat Mekkatorque to the stage and give a sermon or two!
And just get a gander of this good lookin' longbeard, eh?
A cool ram and spiffy new goggles, I'm all set over here.
And hey, remember if ye need a used wallet or a nibbled on chew toy, see Flùffÿ at any time in the Dusky caverns in Ironforge... Even you horde visit there often enough with yer fishin' antics. I'll give ye a deal on a flea bit blanket, too.
Now, onto size matters.
Ye just get a look at the size o' these wolpertingers.... I bet they're ten times the size o' them mulgore scrawny tingers ye got over there! And ye think yer pint sized pink elephants are large, look at ours!
An' don't be sayin' nothin' about me size... me beard's longer than them horns and antlers an' this wolpertinger's done nibbled off the ends!
Ye just don't have the problems we have an' that's why the Horde an' Alliance always gonna have their spit-spats!
Eh, anyway, nice workin' with ye antlers... see ye at brewfest or maybe a Darkmoon Faire sometime! And yeah, watch them goblins lad. See we can agree on some things!


What Had Happened Was...
We have this new old Orc...
pics submitted by Gerald Atric himself... so kind of him
If you have not met Gerald Atric, Orc of Redwood Tribes, you are missing out on morning exercise routines, bagels, jumping and dodging, and a whole lot of .... sleeping.

Is he sleeping or is it a trick?

It could hurt if he falls on the Sage...

Can you find Atric in this picture, or is the Longwalker distracting you?
Atric is now an Elder in Redwood Tribes and is
instrumental in teaching younglings about thinking first and jumping later.
And just thinking first overall

Rumors and Tall Tales
As overheard at Spirits of the Earth Mother Tavern
Okwaho points out that Mother Tauranook of the Taunka has excellent taste in shoulder armor.
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Hey Gin'jojo, you shouldn't pose for your cameo shots with enemies behind you... lucky for you Rada, the good mage, is there to help you!

Ale in hand, Leidolfr ponders if he missed the boat

Or did Owly tip the Goblins for an early ride, hoping the Warchief would not notice

Then again, given the safety record of the UC elevators, are you sure Raush would feel safe enough on tha platform?... And that goes for many of you!!!

Stunning Vistas
Submit pictures to share of your travels and journeys!
Kol'gara, those wolf's eyes are glowy...
Edward LaFontaine has made fluffy friends


Something is a little different about Dumhed these days, but he's still one of
our favorite peons!

Zeaha the Cat Found a Scratch Post?
or a Hangout?

Roh'vok Already Visiting
the Spooky Places

Maragwyn finds some of the most amazing angles

Maragwyn Makes this Place Look Beautiful

Bad T'zeki! It's too early for Wrathgate
That will be Oct 22nd!

Maragwyn captures a beautiful sight and a scarecrow, or is it a scareshu'halo?
Fear The Grin Shouts are already Sounding Across the Fjords


Zeaha hanging with The Wanderer
Wait that is not Branharak?!?!?!
But I bet they will be friends!
Crystals Sparkling in the Dusk Captured by Zeaha


Calendar of Events - contact editor to be added

For Weekly events, see the Grobbulus Calendar posted in the Horde RP Discord
-
Wednesdays 6pm - Homeland Relief hosted by Bulwark - Azeroth - different locations each week
-
Fridays 6pm - Weekly Circle RP with Redwood - open to all. (most fridays)
-
Sun 6pm - Redwood Roadhouse and will sometimes Host other events
-
Monday (5pm) Maragwyn leads new and old activities with The Lighthouse
Many events have an advertisement, see link at the top of the page, and if you have an event you would like to see listed here or advertised msg. Okwaho in game, on Discord: Winter#3381 or email to Lohkawaswildmane@gmail.com
On the Homefront
The Shu'halo look out over their home away from home.

Father Flùffÿ Ram Races to the Tavern Instead of the Checkpoints - maybe he's got a good idea?

Ayashe, Sauromoon, Okwaho and Granpap stand tall against the FTA...
Just the 4 of them

The Tribes complete another Rites of Passage, laying low the scourge in an attempt to push back against the daily invasions... and enjoy a NON-LETHAL Mak'gora. Ah, the
New Horde ways!

